I’ve never dreamed of being Bill Gates. If we’re being truly honest, has anyone pondered that possibility for more than a few seconds before chuckling? However, I consider myself to be a capable wielder of technology who can quickly run a killer slideshow or video presentation with the assistance of the projector. That power has diminished greatly since taking up the “art” of teaching. I have become a bumbling neanderthal who operates with 12 thumbs, types at a rate of two words per minute, figures out the workings of dual-monitor technology about as good as a Guinea pig would.
This phenomenon of technical misfortunes is only commonplace during lessons or presentations to staff. Everything is clean and crisp, and of course well-prepared and tested, all the way up to the exact moment when the screens are needed to mold and save the minds of this new generation. But then without warning or signal, your screen goes blank, your audio cuts out or your school’s ad block decides to quit, leaving you with a room full of hysterical kids because they saw an ad for women’s underwear.
Whatever the misfortune may be, it is bound to slither its way into your equipment the moment you should most expect it: whenever it is needed. This shouldn’t scare you, but instead it should leave you with a sense of relief that you are not only haunted by your students and their parents, but also by man’s best friend: technology. The next time your mouse stops working while you’re printing, your screen goes blank when you cast, or your students display inappropriate images during a lesson, count yourself blessed because you have so many factors rooting for your demise as an educator. Stay cooked or keep cooking.
The Cooked Teacher